Chocolate cake face

The start of spring really makes me happy.  I like winter and snow, but I LOVE spring/summer/fall - and I really appreciate it after a very cold and long winter.  And I love it even more now that Evan is walking around and we can enjoy it together.  I love being outside and would spend the entire day outside if I didn't have to work and had nothing to do.  I would sit on a deck and read and eat and relax forever.  Ok, I would eventually get tired of that, but it sounds good right now because I have an overabundance of deadlines this month.

Yesterday was a fabulous day.  It made me really, really happy that we are allowed to work from home a couple of days a week.  Usually I walk in the door at 6:45pm when I go to the office.  I quickly get dinner ready (either make something quick or microwave something I prepared on the weekend), give Evan a bath, put him to bed, wash up the dishes, make lunches, and go to bed.  Somehow that takes me until 11pm to complete.  When I work from home it's an entirely different story.  I end the work day at 4pm and I am already home!!  Best feeling in the world!!!

Yesterday I was quite ambitious.  Evan and I went to the Nature Center near our house and walked around on the trails.

We had so much fun.  We took a trail that was 0.17 miles long, so it was perfect distance for Evan's little legs.  We didn't get there until around 4:30 and the place closes at 5pm so we couldn't go too far. 

He loves trees - poking them with his fingers and sitting/standing on the stumps.  He also pointed out every stick we came across, which were millions.  As you can see, he was also eating a banana - a miracle.  He's finally starting to up his food intake!

Evan loves flowers.  The daffodils are finally starting to bloom here so he was really excited to go look at the flowers.  So excited that he wouldn't turn around for the camera.

The trail ended at a stream/river under a road.  It was very noisy and less quaint when you are under a four lane highway, but Evan was thrilled to walk in the sand and would have walked straight into the river if I let him.  I can't wait to take him to the pool this summer - he's definitely a fish!

Since we didn't have much time, we pretty much walked to the river and then headed back to the car.  Evan walked most of the way there but wasn't thrilled about having to walk back, so I ended up carrying him about half of the way.  Not a big deal, since we're only talking about 0.17 miles.

Being outside invigorated me so much that I decided I needed to make chocolate cake.  I don't even remember the last time I made chocolate cake.  Have I ever made chocolate cake???  Chocolate Covered Katie had posted a healthy chocolate cake with a crazy ingredient on her Instagram page and I happened to have every ingredient on the list - so how could I not make it??  So I did.

The plate is dirty because this was like my third piece.  I also made her Reese's Pieces Fudge Frosting to go with it.  Both were very delicious.  The "crazy ingredient" was cauliflower.  In the directions it says to put the cauliflower in the food processor with milk and vanilla and blend until completely smooth - well, I have a crappy food processor so there was no way it was ever going to be smooth.  So, my cake has some cauliflower lumps in it... which gave it a bit of a cauliflower essence.  It sounds gross but it actually is still delicious.  The alternative was to make it with pumpkin, but I feel like I eat a lot of pumpkin and hardly ever eat cauliflower - so I wanted to do the cauliflower instead.

Evan loved it too - cauliflower and all.  He wouldn't stop moving long enough for me to take a clear picture (it can't possibly be because he just ate chocolate cake....) so most of them turned out really blurry.  You can see all the chocolate on his face though - at least he got some veggies in, right?

I ended up staying up until 11:45pm washing up the million dishes (while simultaneously watching Call the Midwife) that it took to make the chocolate cake, but it was worth it.  Nothing beats spontaneous cooking!  And then when I finally crawled into bed my mind was going a mile a minute and I couldn't fall asleep anyway.  Pretty much every night I lie awake thinking about nursing school decisions and it makes it hard to fall asleep.  I can't wait for the decision process to be over.


Would you ever eat chocolate cake with cauliflower???

Your favorite thing to do when the weather gets nice??

Snow and ice

Wow, this weekend went super fast.  Maybe because I had a meeting all day on Friday instead of working from home.  And those three days of meetings really wore me out.  I wanted to sleep in on Saturday but Evan had other plans.  He was cutting a tooth and so pretty much was up all night.  I think he fell asleep at around 4am.  And then he was up at 7am.  Definitely not what I was hoping for after only getting a few hours of sleep all week.  He made up for it on Sunday though and we slept until 8am.

Sunday we got our first snow fall of the season!

It ended up being about two or three inches.  I was pretty excited.  Except that my friend Sarah was supposed to come and help me pack but we were too worried about the road conditions so she didn't come.  It was a good thing too because the roads were horrible.  However,  I was sad I didn't get to see her.  Hopefully she makes it on Saturday!

I put Evan in his new snowsuit (compliments of Mimi), and we took Dolce for a walk.

It was getting a little dark so it Is kind of hard to see Evan, but he was all bundled up in snow pants and a winter coat.  That little hat is a bit problematic because it likes to fall down and cover his entire face.  That made him a bit unhappy.  At one point I took him out and let him play in the snow, which he loved, but then getting him back into the stroller was a fight.  Dolce spent the entire time eating snow, which is so annoying because then he has to go out nineteen times in the next hour.  It's a struggle I tell you!

I did get some packing done, even without Sarah's motivation.  I also made English muffin bread, pumpkin soup, chicken soup, and chicken enchilada soup.  And Ivan nicely washed the dishes while. I gave Evan a bath.

This week is a bit stressful because I have my Chem lecture final tomorrow and then moving on Saturday...which means I have to be packed by Saturday too.  The other night while I was rocking Evan to sleep (I know, he's probably too old for this but I don't care), I heard rodents in the walls scurrying about.  I'm not sure if it was mice, rats, squirrels, or what - but it was disgusting and I was counting my blessings that we were moving to a better place (can it be worse???).  We just have to physically move to that other place and that is what stresses me out!

P.S. I found the BOB weather shield!!!!!  I had been looking for it for months and couldn't find it - and then I'm packing up the bedroom closet and found it in a bag.  I was SO HAPPY!!

Did it snow where you live this weekend?

Monthly Mailers!

I wasn't going to blog today because I am not working - and we all know that the only time I find to blog is on my bus ride into work.  However, I wanted to post about my monthly mailer for this past month.  Just in case you can't remember what monthly mailers are and you don't feel like clicking back and seeing my last monthly mailer (I totally understand), I'll just re-explain it really quickly.  Monthly mailers is Sarah's project over at Creating a Better Tomorrow.  You sign up and then get matched with a partner and then you send that partner some snail mail.  Nothing big, no gift, no big pricey item - just a card with some motivational words and maybe a little something special.  This was my second time participating and I got a lovely card from Jane.

It was my first Christmas card of the season!!!  Yay!!  I love getting Christmas cards.  I know so many people are choosing not to do them anymore but I refuse to give it up.  I love selecting the pictures, selecting the background, writing a little note in them, and then mailing them out.  I look forward to it all year and actually bought my cards back in January.  So, you know I was happy when I received this lovely card from Jane.  My husband was even more happy when he saw that Yankee candle car scent.  He loves car scents (probably because he makes the car stink with all his work clothes) and we'll make sure we put it in right before our ten hour drive to Vermont.  Then we can smell fresh laundry the entire drive there.

I know my blog has been such a soul-sucker these days with bad news and gloomy thoughts and stress and the like - but I am really trying to pull myself up by the bootstraps and be more positive.  I talked to a lawyer yesterday (did you know that the District Court has an online chat feature where you can chat with a lawyer about certain issues - like renter/landlord conflicts???)  and also with the local Consumer Protection Agency and I am now fully aware of my rights with regard to my security deposit.  It made me feel better to take control of the situation and I'm sure that since I'm fully prepared and versed in the law I won't need any of this information - but just in case, I'll be ready.

And the best news ever is that I was talking to my best friend (for FOUR HOURS on Saturday, which is what happens when your best friend moves four hours away and you hate the telephone and so haven't actually talked to each other since Feb) and she is actually going to drive up here on Sunday and help me pack and then she's going to drive back the following Saturday and help us move.  I was completely shocked by her generosity.  Those are her only two days off during the week and she's going to drive all the way here just to help us out.  Bad times suck, that's for sure, but it also reminds you who your real friends are and how many people out there truly care for you.  I have such wonderful friends and I must have been much more thoughtful in my younger days - because these people continuously amaze me with their friendship and dedication.  I feel like I haven't been a good friend for a long time because I'm so busy with work, school, golf, family, etc. (which I know is not a good excuse), but I am determined to improve on my friend qualities in the New Year.  Like actually call my friend Sarah and not let ten months pass without talking.

Thank you for sticking around through this depressing time in my life.  I promise I won't continue to throw myself pity-parties for the rest of my life!

Catch-up and Foodie Reveal Day

Yes, I am probably the only blogger who didn't post about Thanksgiving.  We had a good one, but I didn't take any pictures.  It was overshadowed by an email from my landlord that indicates he wants to keep my security deposit.  And pain in my shoulder, neck, back, and head from coughing for three weeks.  It's not to say that my turkey day wasn't special, it was.  It's just to say that I was emotionally exhausted and worn out from anger, coughing, and not sleeping well.  However, on turkey day we went to some golf friends' house and enjoyed an afternoon of yummy food and conversation.  The morning was relaxing as I cooked up some sides and watched the parade.  Good all around.

The rest of the weekend was a bit stressed money-wise as I worked out our budget for how we are going to get through the month with $2000 less and whether we can pay all our bills and still buy food and gas.  I am keeping my fingers crossed that it works out, but it will be a less festive Christmas as we don't have extra money for decorations or a tree or even a wreath...let alone presents.  Luckily Evan is only 1 and doesn't understand presents.

Ivan and I did do our first date of Christmas though!  I had saved some money and we used it to go to the movies.  We went to an 11:05am movie so it was only $6.50 a ticket.  We went and saw Catching Fire and I LOVED it.  Ivan liked it too, because of all the fighting.  The only downside was that Ivan hadn't eaten lunch so he ordered chicken fingers and fries and the total was $18.95.  He thought the guy said $8.95 so we both almost cried when we realized how expensive that small amount of food was.  It was like highway robbery!

This past weekend was also November Foodie Reveal Day for the Foodie Pen Pal exchange I like to participate in.  In case you can't remember what it is, you get a pen pal and exchange a few emails to get to know them and then mail them a box of fun food items.  I've done it for a few months now and I love it.  I won't do it this month because of the money thing mentioned above, but I'll definitely resume when things settle down a bit more.

My partner this month was Alan.  We exchanged a lot of emails and he was a fabulous partner.  He mentioned that he loved spices so I was secretly hoping he'd send me a few in my box.  Well, he did not disappoint!  I got a lovely box from him filled with all kinds of goodies.

Look at all that fun stuff!  And it was nicely packaged in tissue paper and ribbons, to look even more fun.  Let's take a look at some of the fun stuff in there.

Here are the spices.  The Vietnamese cinnamon is amazing.  I use it every day in my coffee and oatmeal and I used it in my pumpkin pie for Thanksgiving.  It's got a stronger flavor that regular cinnamon, but that makes it even better.  The other spice is Sumac Berries.  I think that will taste great on a chicken dish, but I haven't tried it yet.  It smells amazing though.

Then there was this chocolate bar.  You can never go wrong with chocolate.  I was a bit hesitant about crystallized ginger in chocolate because I don't like ginger (except in Asian dishes), but it was fantastic.  The crystallized ginger mixed really well with the dark chocolate and this bar was devoured in no time at all.  

And lastly, these Lara bars.  I love Lara bars and I had never tried these kinds before.  They were tasty though!  I brought them to class to help curb my hunger and I really liked them.  The pecan flavor was my favorite, but they both had a fun and festive fall flavor.  The box also had a delicious chili mix and lots and lots of milk duds.  Yum!  I haven't made the chili yet but it sounded fantastic, and it even suggests putting it on top of spaghetti.  I'm not sure if I'll do that or not, but I can't wait to try the mix.

So that was my box!  It was so great and I really had fun this month putting Alan's box together and then getting his in the mail.  It was a bright spot in a stressful month!

Hope your December is off to a great start!!

Those feelings

The good news is we are about to sign a lease on a new place.  I am very thankful that we found a place to live that wasn't too expensive and that allowed dogs.  It's a bit nerve-wracking renting from someone I don't know and the lease always seems so complicated and binding.  And we somehow have to come up with $2000 for the security deposit, which normally wouldn't be the end of the world because we could save for a few months...but on top of the holidays and extra expenses like $300 electricity bills and $200 payments for my Chemistry class, extra money is few and far between.  It's gonna be a really sparse holiday season.  And a really un-festive one too.  Who wants to decorate when we are going to move and who wants to decorate after we move when the new place looks like a disaster?  And we'll probably not do our 12 Dates of Christmas because we won't have any extra money or time, since we'll be either packing or unpacking.  Usually I am overly excited about the holiday but this year I just can't wait for it to be January.

And on top of that, I have one of those feelings.  You know that pit in your stomach that tells you something bad is going to happen or that you are making a very bad decision? Have you ever had that feeling?  The problem is I don't know what's going to happen or what decision is a bad one.  Is it the apartment?  School? Nursing applications? Work? Evan/Ivan/family? Running?  I have no inclination as to what it might be but I am walking around with a whole in my stomach and I don't really want to be around when thr truth comes to light.  Of course I will be because it's my life, but you know what I mean.

Ok, enough feeling sorry for myself.  

We are supposed to get a ton of snow these next couple of days.  I'm not sure it's actually gonna happen but maybe it will.  If it does I hope I'm at home and not stuck in DC.  A snowy Thanksgiving sounds nice as long as I can pick my turkey up from the farm.  Did I mention I ordered my turkey from a farm?  Yup.  It'll be fresh and organic and free range and all that.  I hope it also tastes good!  

And I did not get a run in yesterday and I won't get one in today either.  I just have too much stuff to get done before the four day weekend that I can't find the time.  Yesterday I didn't even eat lunch until 2pm and then when I looked up again it was 4:30 and I had to run out the door to catch the bus.  It's nice when work flies by but it also usually means that it's been a crazy, exhausting day.  And it was!

I don't really have anything else to say and I don't have any pictures to share with you except that my friend found this fruit and gave it me to.  It's a zapote, a fruit that was common in Honduras.  I've never found it in the US so hubs and I were excited to eat it.  I did look up the nutritional value and found it is about 300 calories!  Yikes, no wonder it is so creamy and delicious!

Hope you are having a great week so far!

Anniversaries and Stress

I really thought that after we turned in our grant that my stress level would go down.  Nope.  That would be too easy.  I've become so stressed that I started clenching my jaw, something I've never done before in my life.  If I'm not stressed about work, what am I stressed about?  Umm, my living situation.

We live in a dump.  We moved here last year because we wanted a two bedroom with the baby and the place is owned by my sister's in laws, so I thought it would be safer knowing the people we were renting from.  WRONG.  I didn't know how run down the place was until we moved in and it's been an entire year and hardly anything has been fixed and many things have broken.  The location is awesome - close to where I pick up the bus, close to my sister's place where we drop Evan off, and close to Ivan's job.  Plus, close to many biking and hiking paths.  However, the windows are crap and either don't open or don't stay open, there are broken closets, the bath tub has a bunch of cracks in it, the back porch door is taped to keep bugs and drafts from coming in, etc.  Recently, the dryer broke and the air conditioner broke.  And the main problem?  In June our electricity bill jumped from $189 to $310.  We are on the budget plan so they average the bills out so we pay the same each month based on the energy used the prior months.  So, while we were paying $189 a month we were actually using a lot more.  Looking back at how much energy we used...in Dec, Jan, and Feb our bill was close to $400 - so that means this year we have to pay a lot more on the budget plan.  It is impossible to use $400 worth of energy in an 1100sq ft. condo unless something is broken.  So, I emailed the owner and said I wanted to pay less rent because the condo was in bad shape and our electricity was too high (and the bill wasn't going to go down unless something was fixed).  That was a week ago. And I still haven't heard back...except my sister said that they got the email...meaning the were pissed and told her husband.  So now I am just confused as to what to do...continue to push for lower rent and piss him and the rest of my sister's in laws off (and probably never have a single thing fixed again) or find a new place.  If we stay and pay lower rent, I'm sure nothing will ever be fixed in the condo again.  If we move, we have to find a place that takes dogs and it will probably cost more money (although with a cheaper electricity bill we may not realize it) and it is expensive to move.  What would you do???  Please tell me what do to!!!!

Ok, it feels a little better getting that off my chest.  But I'm still mega stressed.  And I'm finding it hard to think rationally about it and make a clear decision.

How about we take a break and look at Evan sitting in a box.

That cheers me up.  We were reading the Tickle Monster Laughter Kit and he insisted on sitting in the box.

We also celebrated his one year baptism anniversary.  It wasn't a huge party or anything, but we tried to do something.  We lit his baptism candle, read this passage from the Bible:

Then we said a short prayer, did the sign of the cross with water, and ate some cookies.

Then we took a mini photo with Evan and his candle.

(I'm not sure why my arms look so skinny in that photo - they aren't that bony, trust me.)

It was nice and I really wanted to remember his baptism.  Next year I'll try and be more on top of things and buy him a little baptism present or something.

Then the rest of the night was studying for my Chem exam tonight and trying to catch up on sleep. Which I'd like to do more of right now.

***********************
What is stressing you out these days?

How often do you move?

Do you celebrate baptism or christening anniversaries?

Sick Little Boy

It has been a week of sickness in this house.  Last weekend Evan was just not himself.  He was super clingy, wouldn’t sleep in his crib, wouldn’t nap, and didn’t want to be put down.  This made life quite difficult – especially bedtime.  I had a very tired little boy.  And because he didn’t want to sleep in his crib at all and was waking up all night with a fever, I didn’t sleep much either.

What?  Me?  Cause problems?  Never!

By Monday night he seemed to be back to normal, minus a severely runny noise.  I got him to go down pretty easily and he was fine at my sister’s on Tuesday.  Then he started coughing – one of those wet, congested coughs.  And he coughed all night long – little coughs that wracked his tiny little body.  So I stayed home with him today, took him to the doctor, and am trying to nurse him back to health by giving him lots of steam baths.

The doctor checked him out and ruled out an ear infection (the fever + him pulling on his ears made me think maybe an ear infection or teething – neither it seems).  She gave him some meds to put in a nebulizer if he starts coughing at my sister’s house (however, he’s not going back there until Monday…hopefully he’s better by then).

What are you talking about?  I’m the cutest thing around town!

Sick babies cause lots of stress.  And not just stress because it’s horrible to have a sick baby, but the stress of trying to balance work and family.

Yes, the dreaded work-life balance.  A stressful balance here in the United States of America.

I work for a great organization that recognizes that family is very important.  That’s definitely made my life so much easier.  I can work from home a couple days a week, I can adjust my schedule as needed, I can take Evan on my work trips (although someone always comes with me to watch him).  However, it is still hard.  All night long Evan was coughing and coughing and coughing and I kept thinking: do I work or do I stay home?  Do I stay home and take Evan to the doctor?  Do I go to work and hope he’s ok?  Is he well enough to go to daycare?  Can I take him to the doctor on Friday (when I work from home)?  I already had Monday off and I worked from home on Wednesday – if I don’t go to work today then I will have only gone one day this week.  What’s the right choice in this situation?

It’s always better to stay home and play with me!

Yes – all this was running through my head at 2am.  I don’t want to be a slacker at work and I don’t want to be a mom that works when she should stay home with her sick baby.  That balance is SO HARD.  And honestly, I never really imagined these types of things when I was growing up.  I guess in my head I thought maybe I’d stay home with my kids, like my mom did.  Then I wouldn’t have had to make choices like this on a daily basis.  But I went to college and grad school and Peace Corps and I love my job and I love working.  And there is NO WAY we can afford for me to stay home and take care of the little one. 

But on days like these – I kind of wish I could.  When there is no relief from the guilt – guilt for not going to work or guilt for sending my baby to daycare when he’s sick.  Either way, there is guilt.

Look at me – I can move around now!  I make life more challenging!

I guess I’ll just have to get used to that guilt because I have a feeling I’ll be struggling with these issues of work vs. family for a long time.  Unless I win the lottery.  Which means I should probably buy a ticket because although the lottery is pretty impossible to win – it’s even more impossible to win if you don’t have a ticket.

And another thought – why is it so much easier for me to take off work than for my husband???  It is so much harder for him to ask for off, so I usually end up taking the day off unless I’ve taken a bunch of time off already.

Such is life.  And no matter what – this little angel always comes first!

I’m a little angel and I like to smother you with kisses and hugs!

Bump Shot: Week 38

And another week has passed us by.  They sure do go by fast.  I am still a bit in shock that I'm 38 weeks pregnant, and actually almost 39 (since the Bump Shots always get posted a bit late).  It seems like yesterday I was just 8 weeks pregnant feeling like I had so long to go.  I know, I know, I could still have over three weeks to go.  But still - it's coming up fast.

I feel like I should be a pregnancy pro these days (I mean, I have 38 weeks of experience!), but things just keep changing every week.  I was reading Baby Kerf and she was talking about new pregnancy symptoms that were cropping up and I could relate almost to the T.

** I am experience some serious hot flashes.  It is the weirdest thing because I am NEVER hot.  I am always the cold one.  I always cover up at night, I can wear pants when it's 100* outside, I am freezing in my office when everyone else is complaining of the heat.  I now know what they are going through.  I also know what menopausal women are going through too!  I'll be sitting at my desk and all of a sudden I'll feel my body temperature slowly rising.  And rising.  And rising.  Until I'm really hot and a little sweaty.  I don't actually have sweat running down my face, but I probably have a few beads sitting on my forehead.  It lasts for a while and then goes away.  STRANGE!

Ok, I thought I had some more new pregnancy symptoms but I can't think of anything else.  I am still sleeping GREAT (except when hubs wakes up and wants to have long conversations at 3am or Dolce the Dog has nightmares and starts barking/howling/crying in the middle of the night and I have to go over and wake him up).

** My biggest fear these days is that my water will break without me knowing it and hubs and I will have sex and infect the baby (sorry about the sex mention - probably TMI but how do you think I got pregnant...).  It's probably a crazy fear, but something I think about.  But so many people tell me that your sex drive disappears after you give birth and you don't want to think about sex for weeks and weeks - so I feel like if I'm up for it now, we should keep on doing it.   Ok - enough sex talk!

**  I'm also a tad bit nervous that I was really stressed and anxious this entire pregnancy and I've somehow damaged Maple Baby emotionally.  I read somewhere that women who are pregnant in war zones have a higher tendency to give birth to children that later develop schizophrenia.  And schizophrenia is more common in boys to begin with...  Ok, so I don't live in a war zone but I've been stressed for a lot of the pregnancy.  And not just superficial stress - I've had numerous occassions where I'm so anxious and stressed that I get that pit in my stomach and my heart races.  That can't be too good for the baby.  I really hope that when I wasn't stressed I was super happy and that those emotions transferred stronger than my stress hormones.  I hate to think I already screwed up his little life....

** I only have one more work day left at the office.  I can't believe I'm going to be gone for an entire month.  There are so many transitions happening at work that I'm a bit nervous about what will be going on when I get back.  I still have a week of working from home, but it will be so weird not being at the office every day.  And not commuting.  I'm excited to get some time off and to be able to be home with the baby, but I think I will miss work and my project.  So many exciting things are going on and I had to pass them on to other people.  However, I'm sure I'll cry the day I have to bring Maple Baby to daycare and return to work!

** By far the hardest thing this pregnancy has been drinking enough water.  Isn't that crazy!  I thought the hardest thing might be back pain or sleeping or heartburn or any other symptom.  But no, I didn't have any of those symptoms.  The most difficult thing for me has been trying to get enough liquid in my body.  Yesterday I had a cup of coffee in the morning (decaf) and then it was 3:30pm and I realized I hadn't had a single other thing to drink.  All day.  Whoops.  So I guzzled 16oz of water before going home and then brought a bottle of coconut water to Chemistry.  However, the midwives told me I needed to drink 2L of water a day and I am completely falling short.  I hope I don't give birth to a camel...

**  And lastly, as stated above, I had coffee yesterday!  My love of coffee is returning!!  Woo hoo!!!  I loved coffee with a passion.  Last year while I was training for the marathon I switched to decaf because I thought it would help reduce inflammation in my legs, but I still drank it every morning.  Then I went to Guatemala in January and suffered some serious morning sickness and my love of coffee went down the drain.  I didn't want a single cup.  Ever.  I think during this entire pregnancy I had coffee a total of five times.  I just didn't have any desire for it.  If I needed a small pick-me-up I drank a cup of green tea.  However, this past week I made some coffee and realized I now love it again.  Yum, yum.  Ahh, the simple pleasures.

Bump Shot: Week 37

This Bump Shot is a bit late, as I started my 37th week on Sunday and it's now Thursday, but oh well.  I didn't have a chance to post earlier.  Hubs has been obsessed with playing Yahtzee every night so that has made it difficult to blog.  And to be honest, I enjoy spending time with him and would prefer that to our normal routine where I blog and he watches TV.

So, how is pregnancy going in Week 37?

The same as Week 36.  Not too much difference.  But here are my thoughts:

* I am getting a little annoyed with having to drive to the doctor's every week.  Weekly appointments are not fun.  I love hearing the heartbeat and making sure Maple Baby is healthy, but every week seems like a lot.  I feel like we're there all the time.

* My Braxton-Hicks contractions are out of control.  Seriously, my stomach constantly feels like a cement rock.  It is crazy.  Even when it's "soft" it's still super hard.  I don't know what's going on in there, but a rock hard tummy makes it difficult to sit.  If it's true what the midwives say, that it is my uterus building strength and practicing labor, then my uterus will be a body-building machine by the time we're through.  It's too bad that my tummy won't be this "tight" after pregnancy!

* My appetite has drastically reduced.  It's weird.  I expected to be hungry all the time at this point in my pregnancy, but I'm not.  I have a normal appetite at lunchtime but for dinner I have almost no appetite.  I cook a nice dinner for hubs and then I eat five bites and don't want anymore.  And normally when this happens it means I just don't want what I cooked for dinner so I eat a bunch of other stuff (like ice cream sandwiches and chips, etc.).  However, now I just don't want anything.  The doctor told me I lost three pounds in a week.  He said it was completely fine and that a lot of people lose some weight at the end of their pregnancy but that he was going to "keep an eye on it".   So last night I ate a huge bowl of pasta at 9pm after we got back from the docs.  I think it was too big and too late because I then threw up at 3am.  And to gross you out even more, none of the pasta was digested.  Hubs said that I should not have chosen spaghetti with tomato sauce because it's too acidic.  I would have to agree with him.  Tonight I am going out for Indian food with my college friends - I will have to make sure I don't go overboard and I stay away from tomato-y sauces.

* My clothes are getting too small.  My shirts are starting to get a little short.  My pants fit fine but shirts that easily covered my bump now hang a tad bit high.  I know that belly shirts are coming back in style (the horror!) but I don't think that they mean belly shirts on pregnant women.  It's not really very flattering.  I haven't gotten a stretch mark yet (according to my sister, she got all of hers AFTER delivery) but I can assure you that my big, ol' belly is not sexy and no one wants to see it hanging out of the bottom of my shirt.  It's a good thing I only have to go to the office one more week because I'm not sure what I'd wear after that.

* We finally got the nursery done this past weekend.  That was a huge feat.  I feel very relieved that it's set up.  We even put the baby/doggie gate across the door so that the Dolce-meister can't get in.  I am still working on my hospital bag though.  I put stuff in the bag, I just have to purchase some things that need to go in there.  Like juice (we had bought some but then drank it all) and snacks and batteries.  We have been extremely broke this week because we spent all our money on hubs's new glasses (seriously, $400+ for glasses is ridiculous) and my Chemistry books ($200+) so we couldn't buy anything until pay day (that may also be why I lost three pounds...we have no food in the house).  This weekend we should be able to buy a few more things and finish up the hospital bag.

* Hubs is getting more and more excited.  And nervous.  And terrified.  I think he's going to be a raving lunatic when I go into labor.  I mentioned to him that the baby wasn't moving around a lot and he got over the top worried (so I then had a talk with Maple Baby and told him he had to move around all the time, so he's now a moving machine).  So now hubs calls me ALL. THE. TIME. to make sure the baby's moving.  I also made a comment that maybe my water had broken and was leaking a tiny bit (which it wasn't) and he made me call the doctor and find out exactly what amniotic fluid looks like, etc.  Pretty much, I can't tell him anything because he turns into a crazy worry-wort.  I asked him what he worries about the most and he said that he's afraid I might die in childbirth. I guess that's probably more common in Honduras than here and I tried to tell him that there was a very slim chance that I'd die (unless we got in an accident because he's driving to the birthing center like a crazy person).  However, he gets more and more worried every day.  It's a good thing we have the doulas because I think they may have to give him some chill-pills.

So, those are some of my pregnancy thoughts this week.  I am still feeling like the birth is a ways off.

What do you think?  Any predictions on when I might go into labor?

I am officially due on 9/9....

Bump Shot: 35 Weeks

 

This is a nice comparision shot - in the bottom right corner you can see my belly from Week 29 (about 6 weeks ago).  I, personally, don't think it looks that much bigger now.  However, it FEELS bigger.  And in my mirror it looks bigger.  So, I'm not sure if it really is or it's just my imagination.  I can definitely tell that Maple Baby is getting heavier in there.  My thighs are pretty tired after climbing four flights of stairs to my apartment - and they really shouldn't be.  I wonder how much easier walking/running is going to be without an extra 30+ pounds inside of me.  I'm not sure if that's how much weight I've gained, but it's got to be something like that.  So my legs are probably getting stronger, right?  It's like walking with a weighted vest or something.  Or so I'm pretending.

Although things haven't gone completely downhill, I must admit that pregnancy is getting a tad bit more difficult.  Here are my thoughts on Week 35:

Minor Dislikes

* My feet are swelling more.  I haven't really had much of a problem with swelling up until now.  I think my feet have been swollen a few times, but nothing too noticeable.  Well, now they are swollen almost every day.  Sometimes all day and sometimes just at night.  I lost my work shoes last week (don't ask) and had to wear tennis shoes to work (and it was glorious).  Well, I found my shoes on Sunday so wore them to work yesterday - and it was painful!  My feet got swollen and my shoes felt so uncomfortable.  I wanted to take them off all day but was afraid if I did, I'd never get them back in my shoes.  And I didn't have another pair so I would have had to walk barefoot to the bus!  So, I kept them squished inside my shoes all day and the walk to the bus stop was quite miserable.  I am back in tennis shoes today.  I think maybe God hid my work shoes for a reason and they should stay hidden....

* I have to go to the bathroom at night.  Yup, I went 35 weeks without having to pee in the middle of the night, but that has ended.  I now wake up about 3am-4am and have to use the loo.  The worst is when I wake up at 4:30am to pee and I have to get up at 4:45am to walk the dog.  There is nothing worse than waking up 15 minutes before your alarm is going to go off.  What a bummer.

* I've had more headaches.  I think this is related to not drinking enough, and not some medical condition.  It's annoying though because I'm trying not to take any pain killers.  The headaches I get during pregnancy are nothing compared to the horrible headaches I get when I'm not pregnant (the type that never go away and keep getting stronger and stronger until you can't take it anymore).  It hasn't been hard to avoid Tylenol, but a headache is never really fun.  I took so much Tylenol in my second month of pregnancy when I had that horrendous sinus infection that I feel I shouldn't take another pill for ten years.  I'm trying to drink more water instead!

Those are the main "complaints" I have - nothing too grand and really, nothing to complain about.  Everything else is still pretty much the same.

Likes

I am still liking pregnancy, even with the minor dislikes addressed above.  I always felt that my body was made to birth babies for some reason and so far it has been good to me during pregnancy.  We'll see whether it was made to actually birth the baby in a few weeks! Here are some pregnancy positives:

* No heartburn - yay!

* No problems sleeping, although I miss sleeping on my back.

* No problems walking - I am still walking about 2 miles a day and then about 5 miles on Saturdays.  It still feels great to get moving and work my little body out. It will feel so great to go on my first run after recovering from labor.

* I really love how people/cars stop for me all the time.  If I need to cross the road, cars always stop and let me go.  Seeing as how stopping for people in crosswalks is becoming a dying art, I am always surprised when people stop and let me cross the street, cross parking lots, cross anywhere.  It's great.

* I am still LOVING feeling Maple Baby move.  Sometimes, for a split second, I feel like I have a parasite living in my belly and it catches me by surprise.  I'll feel this whirling going on and then I'll remember it's Maple Baby twisting and turning.  It is so fun and weird at the same time.  And hubs LOVES to rest his hand on my belly and feel him moving his hiney from one side of my belly button to the other.  He would be so shocked if he knew just how much moving around he did in there all day long.

Fears

As the birth of little Maple Baby approaches I feel like there are a few things that are getting me a bit nervous.  I am so excited to meet Maple Baby but I still have a few fears....

* I have a fear, as I'm sure many do, that I'm going to go into labor early.  I can only give birth at the birth center from week 37-42 and so I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I can hold out until at least week 37.  I won't be devastated if I can't give birth in the birthing center, but I really don't want Maple Baby to come too early.

* I'm also starting to get a little nervous about actually giving birth.  I'm hoping that's normal.  It is kind of a scary unknown - something that I'm hoping I'm ready and able to do, but since I have no idea, it's still a bit scary.  How will it feel?  How will I do?  Will I regret not having some sort of pain management?  It's exciting and scary at the same time.

* For some reason I also have a fear of developing postpartum depression.  There is a lot more talk about postpartum depression these days (which is great, since it isn't something that should be swept under the carpet and ignored), but all the talk makes me nervous that it's something that could happen to me.  I have not enjoyed having crazy mood swings during pregnancy (where I go from happy to super sad in ten seconds - I think hubs likes it even less) and I know there will be a big decrease in hormones after the baby is born and it will be normal to have some baby blues, but I'm hoping that that is all that happens.  We shall see.

Ok, this post has gone on for way too long!  That is my Week 35 update - nothing too new and exciting but hopefully somewhat entertaining.