Anniversaries and Stress

I really thought that after we turned in our grant that my stress level would go down.  Nope.  That would be too easy.  I've become so stressed that I started clenching my jaw, something I've never done before in my life.  If I'm not stressed about work, what am I stressed about?  Umm, my living situation.

We live in a dump.  We moved here last year because we wanted a two bedroom with the baby and the place is owned by my sister's in laws, so I thought it would be safer knowing the people we were renting from.  WRONG.  I didn't know how run down the place was until we moved in and it's been an entire year and hardly anything has been fixed and many things have broken.  The location is awesome - close to where I pick up the bus, close to my sister's place where we drop Evan off, and close to Ivan's job.  Plus, close to many biking and hiking paths.  However, the windows are crap and either don't open or don't stay open, there are broken closets, the bath tub has a bunch of cracks in it, the back porch door is taped to keep bugs and drafts from coming in, etc.  Recently, the dryer broke and the air conditioner broke.  And the main problem?  In June our electricity bill jumped from $189 to $310.  We are on the budget plan so they average the bills out so we pay the same each month based on the energy used the prior months.  So, while we were paying $189 a month we were actually using a lot more.  Looking back at how much energy we used...in Dec, Jan, and Feb our bill was close to $400 - so that means this year we have to pay a lot more on the budget plan.  It is impossible to use $400 worth of energy in an 1100sq ft. condo unless something is broken.  So, I emailed the owner and said I wanted to pay less rent because the condo was in bad shape and our electricity was too high (and the bill wasn't going to go down unless something was fixed).  That was a week ago. And I still haven't heard back...except my sister said that they got the email...meaning the were pissed and told her husband.  So now I am just confused as to what to do...continue to push for lower rent and piss him and the rest of my sister's in laws off (and probably never have a single thing fixed again) or find a new place.  If we stay and pay lower rent, I'm sure nothing will ever be fixed in the condo again.  If we move, we have to find a place that takes dogs and it will probably cost more money (although with a cheaper electricity bill we may not realize it) and it is expensive to move.  What would you do???  Please tell me what do to!!!!

Ok, it feels a little better getting that off my chest.  But I'm still mega stressed.  And I'm finding it hard to think rationally about it and make a clear decision.

How about we take a break and look at Evan sitting in a box.

That cheers me up.  We were reading the Tickle Monster Laughter Kit and he insisted on sitting in the box.

We also celebrated his one year baptism anniversary.  It wasn't a huge party or anything, but we tried to do something.  We lit his baptism candle, read this passage from the Bible:

Then we said a short prayer, did the sign of the cross with water, and ate some cookies.

Then we took a mini photo with Evan and his candle.

(I'm not sure why my arms look so skinny in that photo - they aren't that bony, trust me.)

It was nice and I really wanted to remember his baptism.  Next year I'll try and be more on top of things and buy him a little baptism present or something.

Then the rest of the night was studying for my Chem exam tonight and trying to catch up on sleep. Which I'd like to do more of right now.

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What is stressing you out these days?

How often do you move?

Do you celebrate baptism or christening anniversaries?

FIve Question Friday

Another Friday.  Unbelievable.  Where did all the time go?  I feel like it was just Monday yesterday.  Evan is going to be a teenager before I know it (and let's not think about how old I'm gonna be)!

I do have to say that I'm pretty exhausted here.  Last night was not a good sleep night, for Evan or me.  Let me first say that Yerba Mate is a stimulant.  I was not aware of this.  Innocent ol' me was doing a bit of grocery shopping and was dying of thirst.  I picked up a drink in the organic tea section and all I paid attention to was the part that said "pear infusion" or something.  So, I opened it up and chugged it down (don't worry, I paid for it).  Then I looked closer at the bottle and noticed it said Yerba Mate.  Since I'm nursing I thought maybe I should make sure that it's safe for nursing mothers, so I looked to see if it mentioned anything.  And that's when I noticed it talked about being a stimulant, like caffeine.  Oh no - bad news for me.  I haven't had a "stimulant" in forever, so I had a feeling sleep would elude me.  And it did.

Evan slept the first half of the night, but didn't sleep so well the second half.  Part of the problem is that time really flies when you're sleeping.  I felt like I had just gone to sleep and then heard Evan crying and tried to get him to fall back alseep.  Until hubs informed me that it was already 2am.  Baby Evan had slept from 8:30pm - 2:00am.  Not bad!  After that it went down hill, and it didn't help that I went to be so late.  Oh well - a little lost sleep won't harm me too much.

And now, onto Five Question Friday from My Little Life.  I haven't participated for a while so I'm excited to join up this week.

1. Who wakes up in the morning with the kids, you or the hubby?
   Currently, hubs wakes up first because he has to be to work at 6:30am and I don't have to be anywhere.  However, when I go back to work we'll both get up at the same time.  I'll get up to feed Evan or pump and he'll get up to walk Dolce.
2. Do you watch the World Series even if your team isn't in it?
   No.  I definitely don't.  I would watch part of it if the Orioles were playing, maybe.  But maybe not.  I love going to baseball games but I don't really like watching it as much on TV.  Maybe because the best thing about baseball games is the food - hot dogs, nachos, funnel cake, etc.  I like watching the Ravens play though.
3. What is the best compliment you have received?
   Ya know, I don't really know.  When I was pregnant the best compliment was this lactation consultant who said I had great ab structure.  I loved that compliment, even if it wasn't true.  I like unexpected compliments the best - or compliments about my work or my attitude (like being happy or supportive or a good friend, etc.).  Whatever the compliment, I always say thank you.  In high school my math teacher said that when people give you a compliment you should always say thank you, because whether you believe the compliment or not, it is like a gift.  I remember that to this day and no matter what, I always say thank you.
4. Do/Did you dress up to take your kids trick-or-treating?
   This is my son's first Halloween, so I have never taken him trick-or-treating.  I'm not really going to this year either.  He will only be two months and doesn't need a bag of candy (and neither do Dad and I).  We'll put him in a cute pajama outfit and take him out with his cousins (if it's not too cold), but that's about it.  And no, I won't be dressing up.
5. Do you have a favorite Bible verse?  What is it and why?
   Yes, I have a few favorite Bible verses.  I will share my two favorite.
   
   "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29: 11
   
   "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."  Proverbs 3: 5-6
   
   Both of those verses really resonate with me.  When things don't work out the way I was planning or life takes a turn for the worse, these verses make me feel better and less alone.  

So there we go - the five questions and my five answers.

What about you?  What are your Halloween plans?  Favorite Bible verses?